


Thirty Million and One

by enragedbees



Category: Sanders Sides (Web Series)
Genre: Angst
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-02-24
Updated: 2020-02-24
Packaged: 2021-02-27 22:01:53
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,549
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/22872922
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/enragedbees/pseuds/enragedbees
Summary: Deceit desperately wants Thomas to pick the callback over the wedding, and it infuriates him that the others won’t listen to him.
Relationships: Creativity | Roman "Princey" Sanders/Deceit Sanders, roceit if you squint
Comments: 5
Kudos: 57





	Thirty Million and One

**Author's Note:**

> Song rec: Colors by Halsey
> 
> A huge thanks to the incredible thenewlarislynn on tumblr for being my beta reader!!
> 
> This is based on a post by the endlessly talented lostonehero on tumblr, thanks for the inspiration!!!
> 
> I love reading your comments! Please let me know what you think! :)

Deceit was _so close_. He could feel it.

He tried not to let himself get excited. Things could always go wrong. One slip up, one detail gone unaccounted for, and everything might collapse.

But he was _so close_. He had almost done it several times before but he had never gotten this far. Deceit could practically reach out and brush his fingers against victory.

Finally, everything was about to change.

Thomas sat at the witness stand in front of him, panicked and sweating. Deceit hid a smirk.

“Stop stalling, and _admit it!_ ” he snapped. “What _am_ I doing here right now, Thomas? Am I the snake come to trick you into sinning?”

Thomas glared at Deceit, and Deceit smiled and shook his head.

“Or have you had your mind made up since the _moment_ you received the news about the callback? You didn’t even forget about the wedding, did you?! It was all an act!”

“ _Fine!_ I want to go to the callback!”

Deceit’s heart pounded as the room caught its breath. He couldn’t keep the grin from blooming on his face.

_That was it. Finally. I did it,_ he kept saying, over and over in his head, barely unable to believe it. _I did it._

“I was planning on playing WordCrush on my phone during the wedding ceremony to keep my mind off the fact that I’m single,” Thomas said helplessly. “I don’t want to go! I’m… _afraid_ …to go.”

The others all stared at Thomas in disappointment and disbelief. The pain on his face could have broken Deceit’s heart, had he not known from what he was protecting Thomas.

Thomas continued to incriminate himself, but it didn’t matter to Deceit. He got what he wanted. Everything was going to be okay.

Deceit let himself laugh as the others still sat stunned. “ _Yes!_ Prosecution rests, or whatever. Let’s just call it here and put him out of his misery.”

Roman furrowed his brow and lifted a page on his notepad. “Does the juror have his decision?”

Virgil sighed. “Yeah.” He stood up and glared at Deceit. Deceit barely felt the sting.

“I hate to say it, but…the _defendant_ is…guilty. On all charges.”

Thomas hung his head.

“Who knew convincing people to do something they really want to do could be so _easy?_ ” Deceit bragged.

“This is a downer,” Roman sighed.

Thomas bit his lip. “Well, Your Honor, what’s your sentence?”

Deceit could barely hear them talking over the pounding in his ears, the elation swelling in his chest. Their disappointment was inconsequential. It would pass, and everything would be okay. _Finally. Finally._

Roman’s head shot up. He gingerly picked up his gavel. “I hereby sentence you…”

Deceit lifted a hand. “That’s not really necessary. I think _now_ you see that _all_ of this is – ”

“ – To one day at the St. Clifford’s Chapel on the day of Lee and Mary Lee’s wedding!”

And with the bang of Roman’s gavel, Thomas’s eyes snapped open, and Deceit’s relief crumbled.

His heart sank into his stomach. “Wait, _what?!”_

This wasn’t supposed to happen. This had _never_ happened before and Deceit had made sure that it wouldn’t.

Virgil, he expected. Patton had also managed to ruin it before. And there was a reason Logan was deliberately kept away almost every time.

But how could Roman do this to Deceit? How could he not understand?

Roman sighed. “It’s my sworn duty to help Thomas achieve his hopes and dreams.”

He scowled. “But Thomas wouldn’t dream of attaining his hopes through deceitful means.”

Deceit fought back the frustration ebbing in his head, the nausea in his stomach, and the burning behind his eyes. He saw Virgil smile proudly at Roman and gritted his teeth.

“But that’s not _true!_ ” Deceit cried.

Virgil scoffed. “And _you’re_ a beacon of truth?”

“Did I say that?” Deceit snapped. “I missed the part where I said that!”

Thomas shook his head. “I don’t understand. You got what you wanted.”

They would never understand. Deceit had been through this more times than he could count and it always ended the same way. Nobody ever listened to him. Nobody ever believed that he wanted what was best for Thomas. It was foolish of him to believe this would have ended any other way.

Deceit bit his lip hard. He wouldn’t cry, not in front of them.

“But you’re still missing the point!” Deceit cried, voice dripping with venom. “Didn’t it seem _kind of_ ridiculous taking this matter so _seriously_ to the point of settling it in a legal setting?!”

The others just shrugged. Deceit tried not to scream.

“I am _trying to teach you a lesson!”_ He yelled. “But it’s _literally impossible!”_

“Falsehood.”

Deceit just barely sidestepped before Logan rose up right next to him and folded his arms.

“Why don’t you just leave the teaching to me?” He shot Deceit a look of contempt. Deceit refused to wither under it.

“Great,” he snarled. “Well I’m sure Thomas’s friends would love to know that he’s _forcing_ himself to attend their wedding.”

Deceit knew that he had lost. Once again, they had ignored him. He should really have been used to it already. Deceit bottled up his hurt and put on an air of nonchalance.

“It’s clear you all don’t want to listen to reason,” he sighed. Then his tone hardened. “But know this. I’ll always be a part of you. I’m not going _anywhere._ And there are smarter ways to get people to do what you want anyway.”

Deceit sank down, ignoring the scared and hateful faces of the people he wished he could still call friends.

He popped back up in his room, sank to the floor, and covered his face in his hands. Deceit took in a few breaths, unable to keep a few hot tears from slipping out of his eyes.

He took a moment to compose himself, then sniffed and wiped at his eyes. He stood back up and looked around his bedroom.

Journal pages, sticky notes, pushpins, and pieces of string connecting it all covered every inch of the walls and ceilings and parts of the floor. Millions of attempts, millions of outcomes, all failed.

Deceit had stopped counting how many times he had been through this scenario after about two hundred and fifty of them. For how long he had been stuck, it was probably somewhere near thirty million.

No matter what he tried, Thomas always, _always_ , chose the wedding.

And every time Thomas went to the wedding, he never came back.

Deceit pulled some pages down off the wall. He held onto a string by his teeth while he rearranged the papers, trying to create some path he hadn’t tried already.

When Thomas died, everything reset. His life reverted to where it had been a few years prior, and Deceit was the only one who remembered what happened. He didn’t know why it kept happening, he didn’t know why _he_ was the only one who wasn’t reset.

It was like something, or someone, expected him to save Thomas, but no matter what he attempted, he always failed. Nobody listened to him.

He tried getting close to the others, and sometimes, he succeeded. Those were the best of the attempts. Of course his priority was breaking the loop, but during those times, Deceit finally felt like he was a part of the group. He felt loved, he felt appreciated. He believed they would listen to him.

But the moment he even suggested skipping the wedding, they turned on him. Virgil and Patton accused him of only pretending to be friendly to get what he wanted. Roman believed them and never forgave Deceit. That was the worst.

He had _tried_ explaining what he knew would happen, but they never believed him. Deceit couldn’t blame them. He wouldn’t believe himself, either. They all only saw him as a liar.

Deceit pushed a couple pins into the wall. He squinted at the rough plan, trying to work out how every detail would fit with how the others might respond.

At this point, Deceit barely cared about winning, about proving himself right. He just wanted something different to happen. And it wasn’t like he had anything better to do.

He had spent eons reliving the same few years. He could repeat every conversation he had with all the others, verbatim. He knew their exact reactions and responses to every word or phrase. It was what made him such a good mimic.

Deceit took a step back and folded his hands behind his head. This new plan was too similar to this attempt and not different enough from the previous attempt. He sighed and flopped back on his bed.

He draped an arm across his eyes. Deceit had until April to figure out a new plan. He didn’t have to have it all planned immediately.

Deceit stared up at the ceiling, and wondered, for the thirty billionth time, why the others wouldn’t listen.

Thomas was a good person. Didn’t that mean, to some extent, that Deceit was, too?

Deceit closed his eyes. He had gotten very close. He had never gotten this close before. Maybe it would end soon.

Maybe next time, someone would listen. Maybe attempt number thirty million and one would be the one where everything changed.


End file.
